How to Forgive Yourself

1. Recognise the importance of forgiving yourself. Not forgiving yourself will deplete your energy, and leave you feeling all chewed up inside. It keeps you living in the past instead of living in the present – so it’s hard to make the most of what’s happening today.

2. Recognise the long term effects of not forgiving yourself. Those negative emotions like shame and regret are also bad for our long term health – as they undermine and damage our healthy immune system. 

3. Accept and name the emotions you feel. That simple step can help reduce their power as it brings some order and control into our lives – instead of constantly being hit by powerful negative emotions.

4. Reflect on the fact that we all make mistakes, make foolish decisions and act badly at times. It’s part of being human – you’re an imperfect person. We wish we could be perfect and always do the right things – but nobody does, and that includes you, too.

5. Try to let go of other people’s expectations. We can’t please everyone – it’s not going to happen. Decide on your own standards, then try to live by them. If you’re looking for approval you’ll never measure up as you’ll always meet someone who will judge and criticise.

6. Practise self-forgiveness. It’s healthy to acknowledge you regret doing something – but then you need to be willing to let go of the past – and decide to move forward with the goal of doing better.