1. Admit the part you played in undermining the
relationship. Accept – and don’t downplay – any responsibility that is yours.
2. Say you are sorry, and demonstrate appropriate remorse.
Although there is no need to “go over the top” the person must know that you
regret what you did (or said.)
3. Allow the person to ask any questions in order to clear
up misunderstandings (and so they know that you’ve “heard and understood” their
point of view.)
4. Where you are the person who has been offended, be
willing to forgive and to mend the breach (although that doesn’t mean you think
that what they said or done was fine!)
5. Be patient with each other as “moving on” takes time, and
we don’t just forget and start trusting again.
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